Women in leadership, stop lying to young girls (MMO 24 February 2022)

The issue of women representation in leadership or in C-suites has blown up again. I am mad and I don’t think my anger will subside anytime soon, if ever. I think you should be angrier too. 

It has been 27 years since Beijing Declaration and the Platform for Action. If it was a human being, it would have been able to get driver’s license, graduate from college, start working, vote twice, pay tax, get married, have children of its own and may even sign a loan agreement to tie it to 30 years of capitalism bondage. Yet, 27 years has meant little for women. 

We are still fighting the bitter struggle of yelling at the top of our lungs to be given the same opportunities, the same wages, the same credit and respect our male counterparts get as a matter of birth-right. At the rate we are in, I am convinced that there is no such thing as merit when it comes to women. Which is why, year after year when we list Top 10 Richest Malaysians, there will be no woman on that list. 

Like in the Olympics, if a woman is ever to be perceived as successful or rich or capable, a specific female-only list must be created just so that women can compete. Otherwise, swimming in the sea of testosterone, women simply cannot grapple. 

I am all for patriarchal sacrifices and I have nothing against male-dominance by those who have laid their lives to advance in their own classes. After all, handbags, high heels and tampons were created by men. And true enough, men also have many crosses to bear; higher depression and suicide rate in men, more incarceration rate among men – not forgetting deaths in detention, and higher direct combat related deaths in men. 

But let’s be honest. How many powerful positions were filled by men simply because they’re golf buddies with other powerful men? A reality that must sink in sooner; people don’t get hired for their talents and skills but for their clouts. Anyone who is telling you otherwise, is a liar. That’s just how the world works.

If I am being more focused and cogent in my anger, the aim of my hatred is actually those women who are in leadership, who have managed to secure their seats at the big-boys tables, who have redecorated their C-suites and who have driven their customized pink Maseratis. What exactly did you do to get there, sisters?  

With the latest blow-up, I am also convinced that the only way a woman can make it in this world is either by deceiving other women, or holding the place for other men, or getting endorsed by men as a token. 

A rich woman in this country either sells cosmetics products that are harmful to women at a price beyond exorbitant or sells her own dignity by gyrating in front of enough cameras to leave impressionable bank accounts. 

And if women want to have a bigger representation, our voice and ideas are only relevant is we are warming the seat for our husbands. 

Mothers, don’t tell your daughters that they can earn their pink-tinted glass offices atop the highest tower located at the golden triangle in the middle of the city centre. You know they cannot make it unless their fathers are Tan Sris or their names carry birth-titles or they have sleeping partners that are Tan Sris with names that carry birth-titles. 

Women, men are not the enemy. The enemy is other women who have done great disservice by lying to their own nature the minute they hold offices of leadership. Women leaders, who would turn a blind eye for anything that benefitted their husbands or sons, are the enemy. They are the ones who strutted the big walk while disallowing other women from positions of power – never once thinking about mentoring successors or empowering other women around them.   

So they be the first women CEOs, Governors, KSUs, etc while ensuring the game plan for male-dominance remains as status quo. No ceiling being raised, no goalpost being pushed, as long as their own interests (and coffers) are fulfilled. Other women and young girls can continue to slough through a 60-hour work week and yet not make a meagre of the price these women leaders paid for their Richard Mille watches. 

We are told to sit still and look pretty while swallowing the bitter pill of reality: nothing we do in our lifetimes will amount to anything. We are placated by sayings such as ‘We will be rewarded in the afterlife because we are living with higher morality and with dignity.” All the while they sleep with the right partners to ensure riches beyond means. It’s easier to dream big when you’re waking up in a luxurious penthouse.  

Young girls, don’t be deceived. These women are the enemy. 

Fatihah Jamhari is an angry woman, who hasn’t the promised pink Maserati, pink Birkin bags, and pink-tinted glass office atop the golden triangle. 

*First published in Malay Mail Online, Feb 24, 2022